Here are proven tactics to build meaningful relationships with high-capacity givers…without being pushy, weird, or forgotten.
It’s no secret that getting the right donor on board can change everything.
The budget breathes easier.
Staff morale improves.
Your whole year pivots toward possibility.
But the donors with the greatest capacity? They’re almost always the busiest people you’ll ever try to reach. Or, they’ve created rules around their irreplaceable asset, their time, that create margin.
Let’s be real—these are people with executive calendars, overlapping commitments, and gatekeepers guarding their inboxes like Fort Knox.
But busy donors aren’t untouchable.
They’re just… intentional.
And if you’re thoughtful, strategic, and respectful of their time, you can get the meeting.
Today, I’ll walk you through:
- How to get a busy donor to take your meeting
- What to say when you actually get the time
- How to follow up so they remember—and want to help again
Plus, I’m sharing 3 actual email scripts we’ve used to reach high-capacity givers (and secure $10k+ gifts).
1. How to get busy donors to take your meeting
If you’re tempted to copy/paste a generic “coffee chat” email, stop right there.
This isn’t a volume game. It’s not about blasting 50 people. It’s about starting 5 real relationships.
Here’s how:
Lead with relevance
Mention what connects you: a mutual contact, a shared value, or something specific they’ve done (e.g. a cause they supported, a quote from an article, etc).
In preparation for a first contact with a lapsed supporter who was in the C-suite of a Billion dollar firm, I listened to this leader’s public remarks at a recent company employee gathering. The three principles this leader shared became the theme I chose to write to him about. I asked this leader, using his exact words regarding the three principles, to join our organization for a podcast recording. He said yes, and the relationship subsequently reactivated at a much higher level in the years following that podcast appearance.
Ask for something small
“Would you have 20 minutes for a quick call?” is much more effective than “Let’s grab lunch.” Time is their most precious commodity—honor it.
Never make it about the money.
Your first meeting isn’t about the ask. It’s about the relationship. Trust me: major donors are expecting you to play the long game.
Here’s a script that’s worked for us:
EMAIL SCRIPT #1: “Lead with curiosity”
Subject: Quick call?
Hi {First Name},
I came across your support of [Organization or Cause] and was really encouraged—especially [reference something specific].
I work with [Your Org Name], where we’re focused on [your mission, briefly]. I’d love to hear more about how you think about generosity and what inspires your giving. Would you have 20 minutes for a quick call in the next week or two?
I promise no pitch—just a genuine conversation.
Thanks so much,
Name
2. What to say when you meet a busy donor
You got the meeting… now what? Here’s where many fundraisers stall. Think of your role here as a curator of stories and a student of their values.
Ask thoughtful questions.
Don’t ask, “So, what do you do?” They’ve answered that 1,000 times.
Instead, ask: “When did generosity first become important to you?” or “I’m always curious—what causes do you find yourself returning to again and again?”
Spend 90% of the time listening.
Seriously. This isn’t about delivering a pitch. It’s about discovering alignment.
Tell one great story.
Have a single, memorable story in your back pocket—something that shows the real-world impact of your work. Frame it around transformation, not just need.
3. How to follow up so they remember you
This is where many fundraisers drop the ball. They get the meeting. They say thank you. And then…silence.
But the best donors want to know: Did what I share help? Did you take action?
That’s where the “Closing the Loop” Technique comes in.
Here’s how to do it:
EMAIL SCRIPT #2: “Close the loop”
Hi {First Name},
Thank you again for taking the time to speak with me last week. I really appreciated your insight about [mention a specific point they made].
I took your advice and reached out to [person or org], and it’s already opening doors.
Grateful for your generosity—not just with your resources, but your perspective too.
I’ll keep you posted as things develop. And if I can ever be helpful to you or others in your world, don’t hesitate to ask.
Name
EMAIL SCRIPT #3: “Add value later”
Hi {First Name},
Saw this article and thought of our conversation about [insert topic].
No response needed—just thought you’d enjoy.
All the best,
Name
Final Thought: Busy people likely aren’t avoiding you
They’re just filtering out noise.
If you can be:
- Thoughtful
- Specific
- Grateful
- And generous with your attention
You’ll rise above the noise and start building real partnerships that last.
Want more scripts like this? Or a complete donor email series to warm up new prospects? I’ve got you covered. Check out our Strategic Fundraising Plan Kit for ready-to-use templates.
FAQ:
Still have doubts about this approach?
“Isn’t this kind of... obvious?”
It might feel that way. But the truth? Almost no one actually does this consistently.
Following up twice after a donor meeting already puts you in the top 10% of fundraisers. It’s not about genius-level tactics—it’s about intentionality and follow-through. That’s what builds trust.
“This won’t work on my donors. They’re more formal.”
Great point. The principles still work—you just tweak the tone. If your donors are more traditional, a handwritten note might beat an email. Or a phone call instead of a Zoom. It’s not about the method—it’s about the mindset: show up curious, grateful, and prepared.
“But I don’t have access to these kinds of donors.”
You don’t need a secret Rolodex. Start with who you can reach:
- A former board member
- A peer fundraiser who knows someone
- Someone whose giving you’ve seen publicly
Still no connection? Engage with their work online, comment thoughtfully, then follow up with a warm, respectful message.
“These email scripts don’t sound like me.”
They’re not supposed to. These are scaffolding.You should edit them to reflect your own voice and your organization’s tone. What matters is the clarity, brevity, and intention behind the message, not the exact phrasing.
“Where’s the proof that this actually works?”
Fair ask. We’ve seen this approach lead to major gifts across faith-based and secular nonprofits—from $5k new donor gifts to $100k+ re-engagements.
One Portland-based org secured its two largest gifts ever just by tightening up its outreach and follow-up strategy.
“I’m still nervous to reach out. What if I get it wrong?”
That fear is real. But most busy donors aren’t looking for perfection.
They’re looking for people who care, who listen, and who follow through. If you show up thoughtfully—even imperfectly—you’ll be ahead of most.
Still feeling stuck?
We’ve helped dozens of leaders script their outreach, land donor meetings, and follow up in a way that builds lasting generosity. If you want a second set of eyes on your outreach or help building your donor map, schedule a call with our team here.
